Tuesday, December 14, 2010

Long-running Baltimore zine seeks submissions for special "hon" edition

December 14, 2010
For immediate release


BALTIMORE, Md. – Prompted by the recent public furor over a Hampden restaurant-owner's trademarking of the word "hon", award-winning local literary zine Smile, Hon, You're in Baltimore! announces a call for submissions of stories, essays, poetry, photography and related artwork for an upcoming issue focusing on the term's roots, its celebration and exploitation, and its past, present and future roles in Baltimore's identity.

"Given the anger and pure, raw emotion floating around out there, it's clear that there is much more at play here than a simple three-letter term of endearment," says Smile, Hon Editor William P. Tandy. "That said, what a wonderful thing it would be if we could put this well-nigh unprecedented outrage and energy to positive use – for the city, for ourselves, for each other."

Questions and ideas to consider include (but are not limited to):

- Are you angered by Denise Whiting's actions in and of themselves? If so, why?

- Do you see Ms. Whiting's actions, and the rancorous public response to them, as being representative of a bigger picture? If so, how? Are there implications of gentrification, greed, corruption, racism, class-ism, etc.? If so, how?

- If you aren't necessarily enraged by these events, do you see other necessary changes within this context?

- What would you like to see going forward?


- Family photographs/other artwork depicting genuine Baltimore "hons", versus the manufactured, exploitative caricatures Ms. Whiting has perpetuated in recent years.

As always with Smile, Hon, personal experience and wisdom are always good vehicles for discussion. Also, please note that we are not looking to produce an issue focused exclusively on the question of new Baltimore vs. old Baltimore. Rather, Tandy seeks to "keep all channels open, and use Ms. Whiting's actions to open a deeper dialogue."

"Together, I think we can create something here that will be of great interest not only to Baltimoreans, but anyone struggling with similar issues in other cities, too," he notes.

Articles (100 – 1,000 words) are preferably received via e-mail (wpt@eightstonepress.com) as attached Word documents. Image files should be approximately 5" x 7", 300+ dpi (.JPG or .TIF format). All contributors will receive a byline/artist credit for their work as well as two (2) complimentary copies of the issue when published. The deadline for submissions is Saturday, January 15, 2011.

From the harbor to the hills, Smile, Hon, You're in Baltimore! collects the tales of those on whom Mobtown has left her indelible mark. Polished, professional essays; barroom sermons delivered from the sanctity of a favorite stool; the poet's fleeting sentiment, captured in both word and snapshot – Smile, Hon offers a slice of Baltimore as told by Baltimore, presented with the time-honored DIY accessibility of a limited-run, handcrafted zine. A two-time Utne Independent Press Award Nominee, Smile, Hon has also been dubbed "Best Zine" by Baltimore Magazine (2008) and Baltimore City Paper (2004).

An Eight-Stone Press production, Smile, Hon, You're in Baltimore! is available locally for purchase at Atomic Books (Baltimore, MD); City Lights Books (San Francisco, CA) Cyclops Books & Music (Baltimore, MD); Microcosm Publishing (Bloomington, IN, and Portland, OR); Quimby's (Chicago, IL); Red Emma's Bookstore Coffeehouse (Baltimore, MD) and Ukazoo Books (Towson, MD). For more information, contact:

William P. Tandy, Editor
Eight-Stone Press
P.O. Box 11064
Baltimore, MD 21212
http://www.eightstonepress.com
wpt@eightstonepress.com


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Monday, December 6, 2010

SMILE, HON packs the house!

BALTIMORE, Md. – More than 50 people turned out at Atomic Books in Hampden on the evening of Friday, December 3, 2010, to celebrate the release of Smile, Hon, You're in Baltimore! No. 13, the latest issue in the award-winning series published by Eight-Stone Press.

Those in attendance enjoyed festive refreshments as issue contributors E. Doyle-Gillespie, Sharon Goldner, Heck, Alex Hewett, Bill Hughes, Jonas Kyle-Sidell, Sarah Jane Miller, Benn Ray and Jeffrey L. Shipley read their work aloud. Smile, Hon Editor, Publisher and contributing writer William P. Tandy hosted the event.

VIDEO (Courtesy of Bill Hughes)

The “Lucky # Thirteeen” Issue of Eight-Stone Press Presented at a Release Party, held at Atomic Books, in Hampden, Hon. from William Hughes on Vimeo.


PHOTOS (Courtesy of Bill Hughes)

PHOTOS (Courtesy of Davida Gypsy Breier)

In related news, Smile, Hon is accepting submissions of ostensibly Baltimore-related stories, essays, poetry, photography and other artwork for its upcoming fourteenth installment through December 15, 2010. To submit work, or for more information, e-mail wpt@eightstonepress.com, or contact:

William P. Tandy, Editor
Eight-Stone Press
P.O. Box 11064
Baltimore, MD 21212
http://www.eightstonepress.com
http://eightstonepress.blogspot.com
http://www.facebook.com/wptandy
http://www.twitter.com/eightstonepress

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Monday, November 29, 2010

SMILE, HON release party this Friday!

BALTIMORE, Md. - Join Atomic Books and Eight-Stone Press in celebrating the publication of Smile, Hon, You're in Baltimore! No. 13, the latest issue in the award-winning series, from 7:00 p.m. to 9:00 p.m. this Friday, December 3, 2010, at Atomic Books, 3620 Falls Road, Baltimore, Maryland 21211. This free event will feature light refreshments, and issue contributors will be on hand to share their unique tales of life in Baltimore. For more information, e-mail wpt@eightstonepress.com.

In related news, Smile, Hon, You're in Baltimore! is accepting submissions of your Mobtown-related stories, essays, poetry, photography and other artwork for the forthcoming Smile, Hon No. 14 through Wednesday, December 15, 2010. Creative non-fiction is preferred, though all submissions will be considered. Articles (100 – 2,000 words) are preferably received via e-mail (wpt@eightstonepress.com) as attached Word documents. Image files should be approximately 5" x 7", 300+ dpi (.JPG or .TIF format). All contributors will receive a byline/artist credit for their work as well as two (2) complimentary copies of the issue in which their work appears.

From the harbor to the hills, Smile, Hon, You're in Baltimore! collects the tales of those on whom Mobtown has left her indelible mark. Polished, professional essays; barroom sermons delivered from the sanctity of a favorite stool; the poet's fleeting sentiment, captured in both word and snapshot – Smile, Hon offers a slice of Baltimore as told by Baltimore, presented with the time-honored DIY accessibility of a limited-run, handcrafted zine. A two-time Utne Independent Press Award Nominee, Smile, Hon has also been dubbed "Best Zine" by Baltimore Magazine (2008) and Baltimore City Paper (2004).

An Eight-Stone Press production, Smile, Hon, You're in Baltimore! is available locally for purchase at Atomic Books (Baltimore, MD); City Lights Books (San Francisco, CA) Cyclops Books & Music (Baltimore, MD); Microcosm Publishing (Bloomington, IN, and Portland, OR); Quimby's (Chicago, IL); Red Emma's Bookstore Coffeehouse (Baltimore, MD) and Ukazoo Books (Towson, MD).

Wednesday, November 17, 2010

Horror fanzine TALES OF BLOOD AND ROSES now seeking submissions

BALTIMORE, Md. - Frequent Smile, Hon, You're in Baltimore! contributor Jeffrey L. Shipley announces a call for submissions in the vein of "love gone wrong" for the forthcoming debut issue of horror fanzine Tales of Blood and Roses. Send your horror/thriller-related stories, poems, photography or other artwork to TalesofBloodandRoses@yahoo.com, or visit www.talesofbloodandroses.com for more information.

In related news, look for Shipley's short story "Nancy is Waiting" in the brand-new Smile, Hon, You're in Baltimore! No. 13, published by Eight-Stone Press.

Tuesday, November 16, 2010

Planet Cancer publishes SMILE, HON editor's essay

BALTIMORE, Md.Planet Cancer (PC), a non-profit organization dedicated to providing a critical community of peer support and advocacy for young adults with cancer, has published Smile, Hon, You're in Baltimore! editor (and cancer survivor) William P. Tandy's essay "Late for Work" on the website for PC's recently published book, Planet Cancer: The Frequently Bizarre Yet Always Informative Experiences and Thoughts of Your Fellow Natives (to which Tandy is also a contributing writer).

Diagnosed with Stage II-B non-Hodgkin's lymphoma in March 2007, Tandy underwent six months of aggressive chemotherapy. His essay, "Late for Work", offers a glimpse of life's post-treatment realities. Tandy's essay, "What It's Really Like to Be Misdiagnosed", appears in the book.

Published in September 2010, Planet Cancer: The Frequently Bizarre Yet Always Informative Experiences and Thoughts of Your Fellow Natives addresses the questions and needs of the nearly 70,000 young adults, age 18-40, diagnosed with cancer in the United States every year. An honest, down-to-earth guide to living in this new world, from Diagnosis to Post-Treatment, each chapter is informed by Planet Cancer's voice – authoritative, funny, friendly, no-nonsense. Deeply personal, unflinching and often hilarious, Planet Cancer, enlivened with quotes and real-life stories from PC members, gives the uninitiated a sense of community while removing some of the mystery and fear of the unknown.

Champion bicyclist and cancer survivor Lance Armstrong calls Planet Cancer "a mountain of practical information in a funny, you're-not-alone delivery. This is the book for young adults and their loved ones affected by cancer."

Planet Cancer: The Frequently Bizarre Yet Always Informative Experiences and Thoughts of Your Fellow Natives is available from Amazon, Barnes & Noble, Book People and Borders, or ask your local retailer. For more information, visit www.planetcancerbook.com or www.planetcancer.org.


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Thursday, November 4, 2010

SMILE, HON seeking submissions!

BALTIMORE, Md. - Smile, Hon, You're in Baltimore! is accepting submissions of your Mobtown-related stories, essays, poetry, photography and other artwork for the forthcoming Smile, Hon No. 14 through Wednesday, December 15, 2010. Creative non-fiction is preferred, though all submissions will be considered. Articles (100 – 2,000 words) are preferably received via e-mail (wpt@eightstonepress.com) as attached Word documents. Image files should be approximately 5" x 7", 300+ dpi (.JPG or .TIF format). All contributors will receive a byline/artist credit for their work as well as two (2) complimentary copies of the issue in which their work appears.

From the harbor to the hills, Smile, Hon, You're in Baltimore! collects the tales of those on whom Mobtown has left her indelible mark. Polished, professional essays; barroom sermons delivered from the sanctity of a favorite stool; the poet's fleeting sentiment, captured in both word and snapshot – Smile, Hon offers a slice of Baltimore as told by Baltimore, presented with the time-honored DIY accessibility of a limited-run, handcrafted zine. A two-time Utne Independent Press Award Nominee, Smile, Hon has also been dubbed "Best Zine" by Baltimore Magazine (2008) and Baltimore City Paper (2004).

An Eight-Stone Press production, Smile, Hon, You're in Baltimore! is available locally for purchase at Atomic Books (Baltimore, MD); City Lights Books (San Francisco, CA) Cyclops Books & Music (Baltimore, MD); Microcosm Publishing (Bloomington, IN, and Portland, OR); Quimby's (Chicago, IL); Red Emma's Bookstore Coffeehouse (Baltimore, MD) and Ukazoo Books (Towson, MD).

Wednesday, October 27, 2010

Eight-Stone Press Publishes SMILE, HON, YOU'RE IN BALTIMORE! No. 13

BALTIMORE, Md. – Fatal attractions, loved-ones' laments and bloody vendettas pepper the pages of Smile, Hon, You're in Baltimore! No. 13, the latest installment in the award-winning series published by Eight-Stone Press.

In this issue, BILL HUGHES takes the plunge into Baltimore harbor; EARL CROWN soaks up the blood and booze of the old Baltimore music scene; STACEY A. PETERSON wonders if she made the right move in coming here; and JOE HIGLER comes face-to-face with the sniper himself, John Allen Muhammad, plus a whole lot more. Contributors include:

- COURTNEY BEARDSWORTH
- KEITH BERRY
- DAVIDA GYPSY BREIER
- RANDY BROOKS
- JENNY CAMPBELL
- WAYNE COUNTRYMAN
- CARYN COYLE
- EARL CROWN
- E. DOYLE-GILLESPIE
- S.J. FERRANDI
- MARTHA GATEWOOD
- SHARON GOLDNER
- HECK
- ALEX HEWETT
- JOE HIGLER
- IAN HOCHBERG
- BILL HUGHES
- OTIS JAMES
- JUDITH KRUMMECK
- JONAS KYLE-SIDELL
- PHILIP EDWARD LAUBNER
- ALLYSON LEIGH
- SARAH JANE MILLER
- HOLLY MORSE-ELLINGTON
- STACEY A. PETERSON
- BENN RAY
- STEVE ROBERTS
- NOAM SANE
- JEFFREY L. SHIPLEY
- DEE SMITH
- WILLIAM P. TANDY
- LISA WISEMAN

From the harbor to the hills, Smile, Hon, You're in Baltimore! collects the tales of those on whom Mobtown has left her indelible mark. Polished, professional essays; barroom sermons delivered from the sanctity of a favorite stool; the poet's fleeting sentiment, captured in both word and snapshot – Smile, Hon offers a slice of Baltimore as told by Baltimore, presented with the time-honored DIY accessibility of a limited-run, handcrafted zine. A two-time Utne Independent Press Award nominee, Smile, Hon has also been dubbed "Best Zine" by Baltimore Magazine (2008) and Baltimore City Paper (2004). Previous theme issues have tackled such topics as waste, rats, scars, tattoos, crime and transit.

Smile, Hon, You're in Baltimore! is an Eight-Stone Press production and is distributed by Atomic Books (Baltimore, MD); City Lights Books (San Francisco, CA); Cyclops Books (Baltimore, MD); Microcosm Publishing (Bloomington, IN, and Portland, OR); Quimby's (Chicago, IL); Red Emma's Bookstore Coffeehouse (Baltimore, MD); and Ukazoo Books (Towson, MD). For more information, contact:

William P. Tandy, Editor
Eight-Stone Press
P.O. Box 11064
Baltimore, MD 21212
E-mail: wpt@eightstonepress.com
Website: http://www.eightstonepress.com
Facebook: http://www.facebook.com/wptandy
Twitter: http://www.twitter.com/eightstonepress

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Friday, October 15, 2010

SMILE, HON contributors Crown, Heck and Tandy read this Sunday

BALTIMORESmile, Hon, You're in Baltimore! contributors EARL CROWN, HECK and WILLIAM P. TANDY headline this month's installment of the "Town Square" reading series beginning at 4:00 p.m. this Sunday, October 17, 2010, at Minas Gallery, 815 W. 36th Street in Hampden. Sarah Jane Miller hosts the event, and an open mic for words and tunes will follow.

About the readers:

EARL CROWN was a resident of Baltimore for 34 years. Due to numerous assassination attempts and an ongoing feud with the Organized Crime Division of the Baltimore City Police Department, Mr. Crown decided to move into a fortified compound in Belize. He has agreed to make a brief appearance in Baltimore in order to read one of his compositions, and will be flying back to Belize immediately afterward.

HECK moved to Baltimore from Brooklyn New York in late 2004. He won "Best Dead-for-100-Years Elephant" from The Village Voice in 2003, and "Best Art" for his giant jazz hand at the AVAM Kinetic Sculpture Race in 2007 and considers himself a raconteur. He is currently the namesake "Darb" in "Darb TV" debuting in a few weeks at the Copy Cat Theater. HECK is more than willing to take a difficult stance on issues, for example he likes puppies way more than kittens. Especially zombie kittens.

Descended from Irish patriot J. Napper Tandy, WILLIAM P. TANDY loves potatoes, hates cabbage and takes his whiskey neat. He is editor, publisher and contributing writer for the critically-acclaimed Smile, Hon, You're in Baltimore!, a submission-based zine ostensibly devoted to life (and death) in Baltimore. Learn more at www.EightStonePress.com.

For more information, contact:

William P. Tandy, Editor
Eight-Stone Press
P.O. Box 11064
Baltimore, MD 21212
E-mail: wpt@eightstonepress.com
Web: http://www.eightstonepress.com
Facebook: http://www.facebook.com/wptandy

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Tuesday, September 21, 2010

SMILE, HON, vegan authors and more this weekend at Baltimore Book Fest!

BALTIMORE – Eight-Stone Press and CityLit Project put the "Baltimore" in the Baltimore Book Festival with an evening of literary mayhem, music and more beginning at 6:00 p.m., Friday, September 24, 2010, at the CityLit tent, on the circle in Mount Vernon.

Smile, Hon, You're in Baltimore! contributing authors Earl Crown, E. Doyle-Gillespie, Sharon Goldner, Fernando Quijano III, William P. Tandy and Lisa Wiseman will offer live interpretations of their work, highlighting the good, bad and ugly of Baltimore life. And don't miss the aural spectacle of "interstellar misfits" The Dirty Marmaduke Flute Squad, whose musical canon includes such classics as "Do You Got a Disease?" and "Show Us Your Boobs (Buy Me a Beer)". While you're there, crack open a complimentary cold one, courtesy of Clipper City Brewing Company, or browse a wide selection of Smile, Hon back issues, t-shirts and more.

Then, come back to the CityLit tent Saturday (9/25) night at 6:30 p.m. for the panel discussion "Eat, Think, Write: Vegan Authors Discuss Their Inspiration". Panelists will include regular Smile, Hon, You're in Baltimore! contributors Davida Gypsy Breier (Ninety-Five: Meeting America's Farmed Animals in Stories and Photographs) and Ben Shaberman (The Vegan Monologues), as well as Jonathan Balcombe (Second Nature), Tracye McQuirter (By Any Greens Necessary) and Corinne Bowen ("Crazy Sexy Wellness"). Plus, get there early and enjoy free cupcakes from Emily's Desserts!

For more information on these events, e-mail wpt@eightstonepress.com.


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Friday, September 10, 2010

SMILE, HON at Baltimore Book Fest, tattoos, zombies and more!

BALTIMORE – Eight-Stone Press and CityLit Project put the "Baltimore" in the Baltimore Book Festival with an evening of literary mayhem, music and more beginning at 6:00 p.m., Friday, September 24, 2010, at the CityLit tent, on the circle in Mount Vernon.

Smile, Hon, You're in Baltimore! contributing authors Earl Crown, E. Doyle-Gillespie, Sharon Goldner, Fernando Quijano III, William P. Tandy and Lisa Wiseman will offer live interpretations of their work, highlighting the good, bad and ugly of Baltimore life. And don't miss the aural spectacle of "interstellar misfits" The Dirty Marmaduke Flute Squad, whose musical canon includes such classics as "Do You Got a Disease?" and "Show Us Your Boobs (Buy Me a Beer)". While you're there, crack open a complimentary cold one, courtesy of Clipper City Brewing Company, or browse a wide selection of Smile, Hon back issues, t-shirts and more.

For more information, e-mail wpt@eightstonepress.com.

***

Going to the Baltimore Tattoo Arts Convention this weekend (9/10-12)? Stop by Atomic Books and pick up a copy of Skin Deep, a special ink-oriented edition of Smile, Hon featuring tattoo-related stories, essays, poetry, color photos, tattooist interviews and more! "[Skin Deep is] a great read." – C.W. Eldridge, Tattoo Archive

***

In related news, regular Smile, Hon contributor Davida Gypsy Breier announces the release of locally-produced horror zine Rigor Mortis #3, featuring original art, genre analysis, reviews of movies, books, graphic novels and more! This issue's highlights include a remembrance of author Z.A. Recht, the "Sexiest Monsters of Filmland", the Feast trilogy, Tony Todd, Nazi zombies and gargantuan movie monsters! Pick up your copy locally at Atomic Books; visit www.leekinginc.com/rigormortis/index.htm for more information.


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Wednesday, September 8, 2010

The company you keep

"According to charging documents, the girl broke down crying and told police, 'I didn't know he would actually do it. I'm not a mind reader. How was I supposed to know he was going to stab him?'"

[From "The violent neighborhood in between," by Peter Hermann. The Baltimore Sun. September 8, 2010.]

Friday, August 27, 2010

Financial Advice of the Magi

When Jimmy Carter eventually passes on, American diplomacy will likely be reduced to Glenn Beck offering gifts of gold, frankincense and seeds...

Wednesday, August 25, 2010

I just don't know...

...what this city is coming to when five men can't conduct an honest game of craps in a Northeast Baltimore alley without fear of being shot.

Tuesday, August 10, 2010

2010 Swim Across the Sound Wrap-Up

I'm back in the wilds of Charm City, having spent a few days in Connecticut, primarily to participate in the St. Vincent Medical Center Foundation's 2010 "Swim Across the Sound". This annual race – which starts in Port Jefferson, Long Island, traverses 15.5 miles across Long Island Sound and ends in Bridgeport, Connecticut – raises money to benefit cancer patients who have fallen on tough times, providing such things as cancer treatment, free breast-cancer screenings...even help with monthly bills.

Most of the competitors participate in relay teams (though there are a few solo swimmers) and rotate in shifts of anywhere from 15 to 30 minutes each (I do not swim in the race myself, but rather drive one of the escort boats that provides support to the swimmers). Our team – comprised of six swimmers – placed 20th overall out of a field of approximately 56; more importantly, however, we collectively raised over $10,000 to benefit the cause.

HOW I GOT INVOLVED

I first participated in the Swim Across the Sound in August 2008. My uncle, Carl, had by that point been volunteering the use of his boat – Concentricity, a 39-foot Hatteras sport-fisherman – as an escort vessel for several years, each year campaigning for me to join him for the Big Day. But life always seemed to get in the way of my making the five-hour drive to Connecticut, where he lives, and committing a few days to the effort.

All of that changed, however, in March 2007, when I was diagnosed with non-Hodgkin's lymphoma. Despite the race falling in the midst of a six-month sentence of aggressive chemotherapy, I nevertheless planned to make the trek that August. Unfortunately, it was not to be, as an infection that left me hospitalized for three days threw off my treatment cycle so that, rather than feeling my (relative) best the day of the Swim, I wound up taking treatment a few days beforehand – which left me completely bottomed-out by race day.

I finished chemo that September, and to this day (knock wood), I remain in the clear, over three years out from diagnosis. But having successfully (albeit narrowly) maintained my hold on life, I was determined to never forget the fact and, going forward, to do whatever I could, whenever I could, to help those still putting up the fight. And so, the following summer, I did everything I could to make the time to help out with the Swim, as I have continued to do ever since.

DAY ONE

The Swim Across the Sound is generally held on the first Saturday in August. Beyond fund-raising, my own part of the trip begins on the preceding Thursday, when I drive from Baltimore to Orange, Connecticut. I make every effort to get there no later than mid-afternoon, so that Carl and I can drive to New Haven for a lunch of my favorite pizza in the world at The Original Frank Pepe Pizzeria Napoletana, where the pizzas are still made in the same coal-fired oven as when the place opened in 1925. That night, the swimmers, boat captains and crew attend the Swim Across the Sound sign-in/dinner presentation at the Holiday Inn Bridgeport. For more than half of his 13 years with the Swim, Carl has hosted the same team, led by Kim Russo. Each year presents a couple of new faces, but most of the team (at least in the time I've been involved) remains the same, making the whole event that much more personal and enjoyable for me.

DAY TWO

On Friday morning, we load up our gear and head back to Bridgeport, where Carl keeps the boat. For the second year in a row, we were joined by Kim's 11-year-old son, Will. The three of us then run the boat across the Sound to Danfords Marina in "Port Jeff", where we spend the remainder of the day prepping the boat – hanging our numbers, scrubbing the decks, topping off the freshwater tank, and so forth – for Saturday's swim. We spend the night aboard at Danfords, conveniently located adjacent to the Bridgeport/Port Jefferson ferry, which delivers all the swimmers from the mainland first thing the following morning.

This year's Friday night in Port Jeff was particularly fun, as we were joined for dinner by zine-stalwart Ken Bausert, publisher of The Ken Chronicles, and his wife, Ro, who live about an hour from the town. After innumerable e-mail exchanges (many of which focused on our mutual appreciation for the music of Warren Zevon), it was fun to finally meet Ken in person; he and Carl were able to connect as well, both being lifelong gearheads. The five of us enjoyed a fine dinner at Pasta Pasta, followed by ice cream and a short walk around town before parting ways.

DAY THREE – RACE DAY

The ferry delivered the swimmers shortly after 7:30 a.m. This year's record-setting field of approximately 286 swimmers then descended upon the marina, breaking out into their respective teams/vessels.

It's a slow and steady ride to the starting point on the beach just beyond the mouth of the harbor as everyone files out of Danfords. In addition to the 56 escort boats were approximately 45 guide boats (which establish and maintain the field perimeter throughout the day), 15 specialty boats (including committee, medical and media), and roughly 20 law enforcement boats, for a total of approximately 130 vessels.

Once in place, the starting swimmer for each team swims to the shoreline for the start of the race. Complicating things this year was the fact that many other swimmers, once their own boats were in place, jumped in the water to "warm up", making it difficult for other boats still filing in to find a good position without running over anyone in the water, or running into other boats, and, thus, a much more chaotic 9:00 a.m. start than usual. Once the proverbial "dust" settled, however, it was business as usual – with the swimmers taking 15-minute relays in the water, while Carl and I traded off one-hour shifts at the helm. Mercifully, there weren't the vast fields of jellyfish that plagued swimmers the first year I was there. Consequently, the large bottle of white vinegar we had brought to treat any potential stings later went back home, thankfully, unopened. Moreover, we enjoyed perfect weather – warm, with clear, sunny skies, and just enough breeze to keep things from getting too uncomfortably hot. The water temperature was in the low 70s. It still makes for a long day, though, as we are keeping pace with swimmers. Our job on the bridge essentially involves engaging and disengaging the transmissions every few seconds so as to keep the swimmers from getting too far ahead of the boat, but not so far back as to force the swimmers to inhale clouds of exhaust from the twin 671 TIB diesel engines every time they take a breath.

Around 5:00 p.m. we reached our destination: Captain's Cove Seaport, located on Bridgeport's Black Rock Harbor. There, all of "Carl's Angels" – Kim, Laina, Fran, Laurie, Katie and Kevin – finished the last few hundred feet of the race together.

After they all had retrieved their belongings a short while later, Carl and I enjoyed a celebratory beer on the boat before driving it back to its home a few miles away. Once she was securely moored and everything stowed, we drove (on land) back to Captain's Cove for the awards presentation and to have our picture taken with the team. But rather than fight the crowds for the by that time pretty-well-picked-over food, Carl suggested we duck out early for dinner at – surprise – Frank Pepe's Fairfield location.

"That is, if you don't mind Pepe's again," Carl said.

Needless to say, no arm-twisting was necessary.

CONCLUSION

"Carl's Angels" placed 20th overall in a field of 56. "We may never win," Carl laughs, "but we are always the best-looking." Most importantly, though, the team collectively raised more than $10,000 to help St. Vincent's Medical Center Foundation help people in their greatest hour of need. And while this year's race might be over, that need continues, and it's not too late to donate, if you are so inclined. Thanks to everyone for your support, and the Powers willing, we will all be back next year to do it again!

WPT

Monday, August 2, 2010

SMILE, HON: Final fund-raising plea

HELP EIGHT-STONE PRESS SUPPORT LOW-INCOME CANCER PATIENTS
It is important to me, as a cancer survivor, to do what I can to help others who have been diagnosed with/are fighting this terrible disease.

Every August since finishing chemotherapy (in September 2007), I have participated in the St. Vincent's Medical Center Foundation's "Swim Across the Sound", a daylong relay race that begins in Port Jefferson, NY, crosses Long Island Sound and finishes in Bridgeport, CT. I do not actually swim in the race – the thousands of jellyfish that drifted through the Sound my first year quickly cured me of any such motivation. Rather, I drive one of the boats that escort each team across the water, providing respite, refreshment and shade to the swimmers. Each year, I've been fortunate enough to work with the same team, a dedicated group of young ladies – led by team captain Kimberly Russo – who have now volunteered their efforts for this event for several years running, and I look forward to working with them again for this year's event this Saturday, August 7, 2010.

The particularly cool thing about the St. Vincent's Foundation is that all of the money raised, rather than going to research, directly benefits lower-income cancer patients (whose diagnosis may have left them unable to work, or otherwise hindered their ability to work) by helping them with regular household expenses such as groceries, utility bills, rent or even mortgage payments. To these ends, last year's Swim Across the Sound raised approximately $2.5 million.

Indeed, we are all feeling the effects of these hard economic times. But imagine, for a moment, the unspeakable difficulty of facing a cancer diagnosis on top of those day-to-day challenges. Bearing that in mind, I humbly appeal to you to help our team help the St. Vincent's Foundation in supporting those unfortunate enough to be experiencing that very scenario. Donations may be made here (and remember, no amount is too small).

*****

SMILE, HON SEEKING SUBMISSIONS!
Smile, Hon, You're in Baltimore! is accepting submissions of your Mobtown-related stories, essays, poetry, photography and other artwork for the forthcoming Smile, Hon No. 13 through Friday, August 13, 2010. Creative non-fiction is preferred, though all submissions will be considered. Articles (100 – 2,000 words) are preferably received via e-mail (wpt@eightstonepress.com) as attached Word documents. Image files should be approximately 5" x 7", 300+ dpi (.JPG or .TIF format). All contributors will receive a byline/artist credit for their work as well as two (2) complimentary copies of the issue in which their work appears.

From the harbor to the hills, Smile, Hon, You're in Baltimore! collects the tales of those on whom Mobtown has left her indelible mark. Polished, professional essays; barroom sermons delivered from the sanctity of a favorite stool; the poet's fleeting sentiment, captured in both word and snapshot – Smile, Hon offers a slice of Baltimore as told by Baltimore, presented with the time-honored DIY accessibility of a limited-run, handcrafted zine. A two-time Utne Independent Press Award Nominee, Smile, Hon has also been dubbed "Best Zine" by Baltimore Magazine (2008) and Baltimore City Paper (2004).

An Eight-Stone Press production, Smile, Hon, You're in Baltimore! is available locally for purchase at Atomic Books (Baltimore, MD); City Lights Books (San Francisco, CA) Cyclops Books & Music (Baltimore, MD); Microcosm Publishing (Bloomington, IN, and Portland, OR); Quimby's (Chicago, IL); Red Emma's Bookstore Coffeehouse (Baltimore, MD) and Ukazoo Books (Towson, MD).


For more information on any of the above announcements, contact:

For more information, contact:

William P. Tandy, Editor
Eight-Stone Press
P.O. Box 11064
Baltimore, Maryland 21212
E-mail: Wpt@eightstonepress.com
Website: http://www.eightstonepress.com
Facebook: http://www.facebook.com/wptandy
Twitter: http://www.twitter.com/eightstonepress


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Sunday, August 1, 2010

Having a wonderfully dirty time!

Thanks to everyone who attended the official Waste release party, held Friday, July 30, 2010, at Atomic Books in Baltimore!

Though I never got an official head-count, I'd qualify the evening as an unmitigated success as the store was packed, offering standing-room only, by the time the readings got underway. Contributing authors who read their work included Lisa Wiseman ("In Defense of Getting Wasted"); Fernando Quijano III ("Pissed On"); Sharon Goldner ("From the Estrogen Files"); Timmy Reed ("A List of Unappreciated Whatever"); Ben Shaberman ("Homage to Colonoscopy"); Sarah Jane Miller (reading the absent Matthew C. Terzi's "Oh, the Places You'll Poo!"); as well as myself ("Talkin' Trash").

Documentarian Bill Hughes was on hand to record the evening via photographs and video:

“Waste” Presented at Release Party at Atomic Books (Hon) from William Hughes on Vimeo.



The release party subsequently received a nice write-up at Baltimore Brew, as well.

Thanks again to all involved for a wonderfully dirty time!


WPT

Wednesday, July 28, 2010

The birdcage

"There is something about the newspaper business that teaches you some humility - you are so used to having something you wrote today winding up in someone's birdcage tomorrow..." - CARL HIAASEN, whose latest novel, STAR ISLAND, was released Tuesday, July 27.

Tuesday, July 27, 2010

BALTIMORE SUN calls WASTE "shocking...hilarious"

The Baltimore Sun calls Waste, the latest issue in the long-running Smile, Hon, You're in Baltimore! series from Eight-Stone Press, "as consistently shocking and hilarious as ever." Moreover, here is your chance to win your very own copy of Waste!

Here, kitty-kitty!

BALTIMORE, Md. - Frequent Smile, Hon, You're in Baltimore! contributor Rahne Alexander has posted a call for submissions for the forthcoming MEOWPOLIS, a cat-themed art show to open October 19, 2010, at the Whole Gallery in the H&H building in Baltimore. Curated by cat ladies Rahne Alexander and Freda Mohr, MEOWPOLIS seeks an extreme variety of cat-inspired paintings, drawings, videos, performances, sculptures and whatever else might be out there. Any media will be considered, but must be by, for, or about cats. (No dogs allowed!) Our hopes and dreams are the following:

1) Some work that actually involves real cats (in humane ways)
2) A ridiculous cat condo, and
3) Art by cats.

The deadline for submissions is September 1, 2010. To submit, please send the following to meowpolisATgmailDOTcom:

a) Photos/documentation of the piece, or if it is yet to be created, a description
b) Dimensions of the work, and any requirements for exhibition of the work, and
c) Contact information (name, email, phone number).


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Monday, July 26, 2010

SMILE, HON release party this Friday!

WASTE RELEASE PARTY!
Join Eight-Stone Press (ESP) for a release party celebrating Waste, the latest theme issue in ESP's long-running, award-winning Smile, Hon, You're in Baltimore! series, from 7:00 p.m. to 9:00 p.m., this Friday, July 30, 2010, at Atomic Books in Baltimore. The evening's festivities will include readings by:

- Sharon Goldner
- Sarah Jane Miller
- Fernando Quijano III
- Timmy Reed
- Ben Shaberman
- William P. Tandy
- Lisa Wiseman

Visit the official event page on Facebook, or for more information, e-mail wpt@eightstonepress.com.

***

SMILE, HON SEEKING SUBMISSIONS!
Smile, Hon, You're in Baltimore! is accepting submissions of your Mobtown-related stories, essays, poetry, photography and other artwork for the forthcoming Smile, Hon No. 13 through Friday, August 13, 2010. Creative non-fiction is preferred, though all submissions will be considered. Articles (100 – 2,000 words) are preferably received via e-mail (wpt@eightstonepress.com) as attached Word documents. Image files should be approximately 5" x 7", 300+ dpi (.JPG or .TIF format). All contributors will receive a byline/artist credit for their work as well as two (2) complimentary copies of the issue in which their work appears.

From the harbor to the hills, Smile, Hon, You're in Baltimore! collects the tales of those on whom Mobtown has left her indelible mark. Polished, professional essays; barroom sermons delivered from the sanctity of a favorite stool; the poet's fleeting sentiment, captured in both word and snapshot – Smile, Hon offers a slice of Baltimore as told by Baltimore, presented with the time-honored DIY accessibility of a limited-run, handcrafted zine. A two-time Utne Independent Press Award Nominee, Smile, Hon has also been dubbed "Best Zine" by Baltimore Magazine (2008) and Baltimore City Paper (2004).

An Eight-Stone Press production, Smile, Hon, You're in Baltimore! is available locally for purchase at Atomic Books (Baltimore, MD); City Lights Books (San Francisco, CA) Cyclops Books & Music (Baltimore, MD); Microcosm Publishing (Bloomington, IN, and Portland, OR); Quimby's (Chicago, IL); Red Emma's Bookstore Coffeehouse (Baltimore, MD) and Ukazoo Books (Towson, MD).

***

HELP EIGHT-STONE PRESS SUPPORT LOW-INCOME CANCER PATIENTS
It is important to me, as a cancer survivor, to do what I can to help others who have been diagnosed with/are fighting this terrible disease.

Every August since finishing chemotherapy (in September 2007), I have participated in the St. Vincent's Medical Center Foundation's "Swim Across the Sound", a daylong relay race that begins in Port Jefferson, NY, crosses Long Island Sound and finishes in Bridgeport, CT. I do not actually swim in the race – the thousands of jellyfish that drifted through the Sound my first year quickly cured me of any such motivation. Rather, I drive one of the boats that escort each team across the water, providing respite, refreshment and shade to the swimmers. Each year, I've been fortunate enough to work with the same team, a dedicated group of young ladies – led by team captain Kimberly Russo – who have now volunteered their efforts for this event for several years running, and I look forward to working with them again for this year's event on Saturday, August 7, 2010.

The particularly cool thing about the St. Vincent's Foundation is that all of the money raised, rather than going to research, directly benefits lower-income cancer patients (whose diagnosis may have left them unable to work, or otherwise hindered their ability to work) by helping them with regular household expenses such as groceries, utility bills, rent or even mortgage payments. To these ends, last year's Swim Across the Sound raised approximately $2.5 million.

Indeed, we are all feeling the effects of these hard economic times. But imagine, for a moment, the unspeakable difficulty of facing a cancer diagnosis on top of those day-to-day challenges. Bearing that in mind, I humbly appeal to you to help our team help the St. Vincent's Foundation in supporting those unfortunate enough to be experiencing that very scenario. Donations may be made here (and remember, no amount is too small).


For more information on any of the above announcements, contact:

For more information, contact:

William P. Tandy, Editor
Eight-Stone Press
P.O. Box 11064
Baltimore, Maryland 21212
E-mail: Wpt@eightstonepress.com
Website: http://www.eightstonepress.com
Facebook: http://www.facebook.com/wptandy
Twitter: http://www.twitter.com/eightstonepress


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Friday, July 23, 2010

Keep your manhole covered

"We get people in here almost every two days with manhole covers," Harmon said. "We can't take them unless they have papers, so we turn them away."

From the article "Bulky manhole covers yield thieves little payoff", by Kate Smith, The Baltimore Sun, July 22, 2010.

Friday, July 16, 2010

Let the healing begin...

A press conference has been scheduled for 3:00 p.m. today to announce that musician and humanitarian Bob Geldof plans to cut a charity single to benefit the victims of the Gaithersburg earthquake. Alas, rebuilding is the easy part - it's the human toll that weighs so heavily upon the soul. Let the healing begin...

Whine and cheese

I've never seen as much press coverage of a child seat recall as has been given to iPhone 4 "problems".

SMILE, HON Release Party & More!

WASTE RELEASE PARTY!
Join Eight-Stone Press (ESP) for a release party celebrating Waste, the latest theme issue in ESP's long-running, award-winning Smile, Hon, You're in Baltimore! series, from 7:00 p.m. to 9:00 p.m., Friday, July 30, 2010, at Atomic Books in Baltimore. The evening's festivities will include readings by:

- Sharon Goldner
- Sarah Jane Miller
- Fernando Quijano III
- Timmy Reed
- Ben Shaberman
- William P. Tandy
- Lisa Wiseman

Visit the official event page on Facebook, or for more information, e-mail wpt@eightstonepress.com.

***

PRAISE FOR SMILE, HON SEX ISSUE!
In related news, former Tower Records distributor Clint Johns praises the sex-soaked Smile, Hon, You're in Flagrante! in the brand-new Xerography Debt #27, out now from Leeking Inc. and Microcosm Publishing. Johns calls Flagrante "sophisticated...the authors are almost evenly distributed by sex, and the overall tone is Anais Nin rather than Penthouse Letters. I can't recommend this highly enough." Read his complete review and those for many other fine zines in Xerography Debt #27, now available from Atomic Books, Microcosm and Leeking Inc.

***

SMILE, HON SEEKING SUBMISSIONS!
Smile, Hon, You're in Baltimore! is accepting submissions of your Mobtown-related stories, essays, poetry, photography and other artwork for the forthcoming Smile, Hon No. 13 through Friday, August 13, 2010. Creative non-fiction is preferred, though all submissions will be considered. Articles (100 – 2,000 words) are preferably received via e-mail (wpt@eightstonepress.com) as attached Word documents. Image files should be approximately 5" x 7", 300+ dpi (.JPG or .TIF format). All contributors will receive a byline/artist credit for their work as well as two (2) complimentary copies of the issue in which their work appears.

From the harbor to the hills, Smile, Hon, You're in Baltimore! collects the tales of those on whom Mobtown has left her indelible mark. Polished, professional essays; barroom sermons delivered from the sanctity of a favorite stool; the poet's fleeting sentiment, captured in both word and snapshot – Smile, Hon offers a slice of Baltimore as told by Baltimore, presented with the time-honored DIY accessibility of a limited-run, handcrafted zine. A two-time Utne Independent Press Award Nominee, Smile, Hon has also been dubbed "Best Zine" by Baltimore Magazine (2008) and Baltimore City Paper (2004).

An Eight-Stone Press production, Smile, Hon, You're in Baltimore! is available locally for purchase at Atomic Books (Baltimore, MD); City Lights Books (San Francisco, CA) Cyclops Books & Music (Baltimore, MD); Microcosm Publishing (Bloomington, IN, and Portland, OR); Quimby's (Chicago, IL); Red Emma's Bookstore Coffeehouse (Baltimore, MD) and Ukazoo Books (Towson, MD).

***

HELP EIGHT-STONE PRESS SUPPORT LOW-INCOME CANCER PATIENTS
It is important to me, as a cancer survivor, to do what I can to help others who have been diagnosed with/are fighting this terrible disease.

Every August since finishing chemotherapy (in September 2007), I have participated in the St. Vincent's Medical Center Foundation's "Swim Across the Sound", a daylong relay race that begins in Port Jefferson, NY, crosses Long Island Sound and finishes in Bridgeport, CT. I do not actually swim in the race – the thousands of jellyfish that drifted through the Sound my first year quickly cured me of any such motivation. Rather, I drive one of the boats that escort each team across the water, providing respite, refreshment and shade to the swimmers. Each year, I've been fortunate enough to work with the same team, a dedicated group of young ladies – led by team captain Kimberly Russo – who have now volunteered their efforts for this event for several years running, and I look forward to working with them again for this year's event on Saturday, August 7, 2010.

The particularly cool thing about the St. Vincent's Foundation is that all of the money raised, rather than going to research, directly benefits lower-income cancer patients (whose diagnosis may have left them unable to work, or otherwise hindered their ability to work) by helping them with regular household expenses such as groceries, utility bills, rent or even mortgage payments. To these ends, last year's Swim Across the Sound raised approximately $2.5 million.

Indeed, we are all feeling the effects of these hard economic times. But imagine, for a moment, the unspeakable difficulty of facing a cancer diagnosis on top of those day-to-day challenges. Bearing that in mind, I humbly appeal to you to help our team help the St. Vincent's Foundation in supporting those unfortunate enough to be experiencing that very scenario. Donations may be made here (and remember, no amount is too small).


For more information on any of the above announcements, contact:

For more information, contact:

William P. Tandy, Editor
Eight-Stone Press
P.O. Box 11064
Baltimore, Maryland 21212
E-mail: Wpt@eightstonepress.com
Website: http://www.eightstonepress.com
Facebook: http://www.facebook.com/wptandy
Twitter: http://www.twitter.com/eightstonepress


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Wednesday, July 7, 2010

WASTE Release Party!

BALTIMORE, Md. - That's right - the long-awaited release party for Waste, the latest theme issue in the award-winning Smile, Hon, You're in Baltimore! series, has finally been scheduled for 7:00 p.m. to 9:00 p.m., Friday, July 30, 2010, at Atomic Books. The evening's festivities will include readings by:

- SHARON GOLDNER
- SARAH JANE MILLER
- FERNANDO QUIJANO III
- TIMMY REED
- BEN SHABERMAN
- WILLIAM P. TANDY
- LISA WISEMAN

So mark your calendars! More details as they become available...

Tuesday, June 29, 2010

Help support the St. Vincent's Medical Center Foundation's annual SWIM ACROSS THE SOUND!

It is important to me, as a cancer survivor, to do what I can to help others who have been diagnosed with/are fighting this terrible disease.

Every August since finishing chemotherapy (in September 2007), I have participated in the St. Vincent's Medical Center Foundation's "Swim Across the Sound", a daylong relay race that begins in Port Jefferson, NY, crosses Long Island Sound and finishes in Bridgeport, CT. I do not actually swim in the race – the thousands of jellyfish that drifted through the Sound my first year quickly cured me of any such motivation. Rather, I drive one of the boats that escort each team across the water, providing respite, refreshment and shade to the swimmers. Each year, I've been fortunate enough to work with the same team, a dedicated group of young ladies – led by team captain Kimberly Russo – who have now volunteered their efforts for this event for several years running, and I look forward to working with them again for this year's event on Saturday, August 7, 2010.

The particularly cool thing about the St. Vincent's Foundation is that all of the money raised, instead of going to research, directly benefits lower-income cancer patients (whose diagnosis may have left them unable to work, or otherwise hindered their ability to work) by helping them with regular household expenses such as groceries, utility bills, rent or even mortgage payments. To these ends, last year's Swim Across the Sound raised approximately $2.5 million.

Indeed, we are all feeling the effects of these hard economic times. But imagine, for a moment, the unspeakable difficulty of facing a cancer diagnosis on top of those day-to-day challenges. Bearing that in mind, I humbly appeal to you to help our team help the St. Vincent’s Foundation in supporting those unfortunate enough to be experiencing that very scenario. Donations may be made here (and remember, no amount is too small).

Thanks for listening, and good health and fortune upon you,


WPT


PS – I have participated in the Susan G. Komen Race for the Cure for the last few years, in the fall, in support of the oncology center where I took treatment. However, as the oncology center has shifted this year’s main fundraising efforts to another event, held in February, it is unlikely that I will participate in this year's Komen race. (Bottom line: I won't be pestering you for donations again three months from now!)

Is a double negative as good as an admission of guilt?

According to the charging document, Dominick Holly told police, "I didn't shoot no one..."

Monday, June 28, 2010

SMILE, HON, YOU'RE IN BALTIMORE! seeks submissions

BALTIMORESmile, Hon, You're in Baltimore! is accepting submissions of your Mobtown-related stories, essays, poetry, photography and other artwork for the forthcoming Smile, Hon No. 13 through Friday, August 13, 2010. Creative non-fiction is preferred, though all submissions will be considered. Articles (100 – 2,000 words) are preferably received via e-mail (wpt@eightstonepress.com) as attached Word documents. Image files should be approximately 5" x 7", 300+ dpi (.JPG or .TIF format). All contributors will receive a byline/artist credit for their work as well as two (2) complimentary copies of the issue in which their work appears.

From the harbor to the hills, Smile, Hon, You're in Baltimore! collects the tales of those on whom Mobtown has left her indelible mark. Polished, professional essays; barroom sermons delivered from the sanctity of a favorite stool; the poet's fleeting sentiment, captured in both word and snapshot – Smile, Hon offers a slice of Baltimore as told by Baltimore, presented with the time-honored DIY accessibility of a limited-run, handcrafted zine. A two-time Utne Independent Press Award Nominee, Smile, Hon has also been dubbed "Best Zine" by Baltimore Magazine (2008) and Baltimore City Paper (2004).

An Eight-Stone Press production, Smile, Hon, You're in Baltimore! is available locally for purchase at Atomic Books (Baltimore, MD); City Lights Books (San Francisco, CA) Cyclops Books & Music (Baltimore, MD); Microcosm Publishing (Bloomington, IN, and Portland, OR); Quimby's (Chicago, IL); and Red Emma's Bookstore Coffeehouse (Baltimore, MD). For more information, contact:

William P. Tandy, Editor
Eight-Stone Press
P.O. Box 11064
Baltimore, Maryland 21212
E-mail: Wpt@eightstonepress.com
Website: http://www.eightstonepress.com
Facebook: http://www.facebook.com/wptandy
Twitter: http://www.twitter.com/eightstonepress


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And perhaps print some souvenir toe tags to boot...

In much the way other cities' tourist centers feature caricature artists, I am seriously considering procuring several large pieces of sidewalk chalk, venturing down to Baltimore's Inner Harbor and charging visitors a flat fee to become chalk outlines along the promenade.

Wednesday, June 2, 2010

SMILE, HON editor, contributors on tonight's edition of THE INDIEBOOKMAN RADIO SHOW!

BALTIMORE, Md.Smile, Hon, You're in Baltimore! Editor William P. Tandy joins host Brad Grochowski for tonight's edition of The Indie Bookman Radio Show to discuss Waste, the latest theme issue in the award-winning Smile, Hon series. Waste contributors J. Gavin Heck, Alex Hewett and Fernando Quijano III will also be on hand to read their work. The Indie Bookman Radio Show kicks off at 8:00 p.m. tonight, Wednesday, June 2, 2010, at www.umbrellaradio.org.

***

In related news, Smile, Hon contributor Davida Gypsy Breier announces a fund-raising effort to benefit the Key West Wildlife Rescue in advance of any oil from the blowout in the Gulf of Mexico reaching the shores of the Florida Keys. For a donation of $25, you will receive a signed 5"x7" print (or 8"x10", for donations of $35 or more) from this or any of Davida’s other Flickr photo sets. For further details, contact Davida@leekinginc.com.

The Key West Wildlife Rescue is currently gearing up to deal with wildlife affected by the oil. To aid its efforts, please consider a direct donation of any of these items.


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Tuesday, June 1, 2010

Eight-Stone Press Publishes WASTE

BALTIMORE, Md. – Defecation, Dumpster-diving and decaying old-world grandeur are but a few of the chunks backing up Waste, the latest "theme" issue in the award-winning Smile, Hon, You're in Baltimore! series from Eight-Stone Press.

In this edition, ANGIE E cleans up Number Two in Aisle Four...again; EARL CROWN ponders the "Martin Gross Neglect" at Springfield Hospital Center; J. GAVIN HECK comes along, sings a song and joins the jamboree of one dirty rat; a good banana goes bad for J.T. CASSIDY; and A.J. MICHEL lays down just what happens – and where it all goes – after you flush, plus a whole lot more. Contributors include:

- HAI ANXIETI
- HANNA BADALOVA
- A. AUBREY BODINE
- DAVIDA GYPSY BREIER
- TOM BROWN
- J.T. CASSIDY
- EARL CROWN
- WAYNE COUNTRYMAN
- E. DOYLE-GILLESPIE
- ANGIE E
- SHARON GOLDNER
- J. GAVIN HECK
- ALEX HEWETT
- JOE HIGLER
- CRAIG KIRCHNER
- A.J. MICHEL
- NEMETZ
- FERNANDO QUIJANO III
- DAN REED
- TIMMY REED
- ALISON SEAY
- BEN SHABERMAN
- JEFFREY L. SHIPLEY
- CHRISTINE STEWART
- MATTHEW C. TERZI
- WILLIAM P. TANDY
- LISA WISEMAN

From the harbor to the hills, Smile, Hon, You're in Baltimore! collects the tales of those on whom Mobtown has left her indelible mark. Polished, professional essays; barroom sermons delivered from the sanctity of a favorite stool; the poet's fleeting sentiment, captured in both word and snapshot – Smile, Hon offers a slice of Baltimore as told by Baltimore, presented with the time-honored DIY accessibility of a limited-run, handcrafted zine. A two-time Utne Independent Press Award nominee, Smile, Hon has also been dubbed "Best Zine" by Baltimore Magazine (2008) and Baltimore City Paper (2004). Previous theme issues have tackled such topics as rats, scars, crime, tattoos, transit, sex and the supernatural.

Smile, Hon, You're in Baltimore! is an Eight-Stone Press production and is distributed by Atomic Books (Baltimore, MD); City Lights Books (San Francisco, CA); Cyclops Books (Baltimore, MD); Microcosm Publishing (Bloomington, IN, and Portland, OR); Quimby's (Chicago, IL); and Red Emma's Bookstore Coffeehouse (Baltimore, MD). For more information, contact:

William P. Tandy, Editor
Eight-Stone Press
P.O. Box 11064
Baltimore, MD 21212
wpt@eightstonepress.com
http://www.eightstonepress.com
http://www.facebook.com/wptandy
http://www.twitter.com/eightstonepress


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Monday, May 24, 2010

Coming in June 2010 from Eight-Stone Press...

WASTE.

A Smile, Hon, You're in Baltimore! production.

Description from jacket copy: "Number Two in Aisle Four. The World's Largest Trash Can. Beautiful old buildings going to rot. And poop. Lots of poop. Here, more than two dozen area contributors weigh in on Waste - the latest theme issue in the award-winning Smile, Hon, You're in Baltimore! series from Eight-Stone Press."

Digest, 68 pages, saddle-stitched. $4.

Saturday, May 22, 2010

Religion: Hallucinogen of the Masses?

This afternoon, while walking along North Charles Street in downtown Baltimore, I witnessed a young man riding his bicycle in circles, the whole time singing "I took acid with Jesus in my heart" to the tune of "She'll Be Coming Around the Mountain," over and over again...

CELEBRITY DEATH MATCH: Stallone vs. Schwarzenegger

"I take back what I said about Stallone earlier - any man who can do that ain't no Hollywood sissy boy..."

Monday, May 17, 2010

Stay tuned...

The Smile, Hon, You're in Baltimore! waste issue is in its pre-press stages and set for publication on or about June 1, 2010. More information to follow...

Tuesday, May 11, 2010

Early-bird registration for 48-Hour Film Project

From regular Smile, Hon, You're in Baltimore! contributor Rob Hatch comes the following dispatch, regarding registration for the 48-Hour Film Project:

The countdown begins....

Less than one week left for discounted early-bird registration; early-bird ends Monday, May 17, 2010. You can register at www.48hourfilm.com/baltimore, or visit the site and try to get on a team. And for those who aren't making movies, screenings will be at The Charles Theater June 22 and 23, and advance tickets will be available online through the Baltimore 48HFP website closer to the date.

So, what are you waiting for? Every second counts when you only have 48 hours to make a film....

Thanks and looking forward to seeing everyone in June,

Rob Hatch
Baltimore & Portland Producer, 48HFP

Wednesday, May 5, 2010

"A View from the Field"

Not all of the work of the Office of Cemetery Oversight goes on at 500 North Calvert Street in Baltimore. An important part of the work occurs in cemeteries around the state. The Investigator for the Office of Cemetery Oversight routinely investigates aspects of complaints firsthand, interviewing complainants, talking with cemetery responsible parties, investigating damages and allegations of improprieties, and trying to get a feel for the issue at hand.

Rest assured that just because the investigator visits your cemetery doesn’t mean that something is wrong. In order to establish a good working relationship with the entities the Office regulates, the investigator will often stop in just to say hello, and get to know you. Think of the investigator as the face of the Office of Cemetery Oversight. Now that the Office is once again fully staffed, it is anticipated that the investigator will be able to spend more time in the field.

Wednesday, April 28, 2010

SMILE, HON: Country Mice and City Rats!

TOWSON, Md.Smile, Hon, You’re in Baltimore! Editor William P. Tandy will sign copies of the award-winning zine (or any other non-biohazardous object) from 1:00 p.m. to 3:00 p.m. this Saturday, May 1, 2010, at the Ukazoo Books booth at the Towson Town Festival. Regular Smile, Hon contributor Davida Gypsy Breier will also be on hand signing copies of Ninety-Five: Meeting America's Farmed Animals in Stories and Photographs.

From the harbor to the hills, the award-winning Smile, Hon, You're in Baltimore! collects the tales of those on whom Mobtown has left her indelible mark. Polished, professional essays; barroom sermons delivered from the sanctity of a favorite stool; the poet's fleeting sentiment, captured in both word and snapshot – Smile, Hon offers a slice of Baltimore as told by Baltimore, presented with the time-honored DIY accessibility of a limited-run, handcrafted zine. A two-time Utne Independent Press Award nominee, Smile, Hon has also been dubbed "Best Zine" by Baltimore Magazine (2008) and Baltimore City Paper (2004).

An Eight-Stone Press production, Smile, Hon, You're in Baltimore! is distributed by Atomic Books (Baltimore, MD); City Lights Books (San Francisco, CA); Cyclops Books & Music (Baltimore, MD); Microcosm Publishing (Bloomington, IN, and Portland, OR); Quimby's (Chicago, IL); Red Emma's Bookstore Coffeehouse (Baltimore, MD) and Ukazoo Books (Towson, MD). For more information, contact:

William P. Tandy, Editor
Eight-Stone Press
P.O. Box 11064
Baltimore, Maryland 21212
E-mail: Wpt@eightstonepress.com
Website: http://www.eightstonepress.com
MySpace: http://www.myspace.com/eightstonepress
Facebook: http://www.facebook.com/wptandy
Twitter: http://www.twitter.com/eightstonepress


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Wednesday, April 21, 2010

Copy cat

I was quietly minding my own this morning when the middle-aged man seated across from me in the waiting room leaned over and asked, "Are they here to clone you?"

"Excuse me?" I replied.

"Are they here to clone you?"

"Not that I know of."

"Ah," he mumbled, settling back into his chair. And with that the doc opened the door and ushered me into the back.

I'm still wondering what was behind Door #2.

Monday, April 19, 2010

REVIEW: The Lost Patrol/"Dark Matter"

THE LOST PATROLDark Matter
Self-Produced; http://www.thelostpatrol.com

As its title implies, the seventh album from New York's Lost Patrol (and second with singer Mollie Israel) finds the band characteristically digging ever-deeper into the darker recesses of the human psyche via reverb-soaked surf guitar, lonesome 12-string rhythm and haunting female vocals.

The great potential Israel demonstrated on the band's last album, 2008's Midnight Matinée, has blossomed considerably on Dark Matter. Here, her lilting voice fully inhabits the melodic twilight of tracks such as "These Days", "Nobody There" and "Ever After".

But looks can be deceiving; indeed, beneath Israel's wan exterior lurks latent, predatory muscle. "Now you keep me / Like a disease" she wails over the menacing groove of "In Your Blood", like an obsessively crazed ex capable of a whole lot more than flattening your tires. This incarnation resurfaces later within the majestic gloom of "Justine" (based on the de Sade character of the same name), wherein Israel admits, "I love the way they tortured you, Justine". Even the yé-yé-inspired bubblegum of "Before I Go" has a decidedly dark cast about it.

On Dark Matter, the band has evidently found common footing given Israel's underscored presence and the supporting roles in which bandmates Stephen Masucci and Michael Williams have seemingly cast themselves. And while this is most assuredly a good thing overall, the band's ardent long-time fans may find themselves lamenting the absence of the soaring and mournful instrumentals that Masucci and Williams brought to the Lost Patrol's earlier work.